I’ve been to a good number of weddings by this point in my life. Most of them Christian based, a handful civil, all of them lovely, despite my aversion to this thing called “religion.” Because even though I don’t share in the same belief structure, I can appreciate and respect what people choose for their own individual marriage ceremonies. Even if Kermit the Priest did tell Peggy and Greg they were marrying into a forever threesome with God. Wait—what?
Rachel and James were married in a Lutheran church. I don’t recall if I’ve been to a specifically Lutheran ceremony before, but this ceremony was…different. I don’t know if it was this particular pastor, this particular church, or if this is common in the Lutheran church in general, maybe someone can enlighten me (without being a total “holier than thou” douche) but his sermon on marriage was all very…NEGATIVE. He carried on and on…and ON about how in this “SINFUL WORLD” your marriage is “DOOMED TO FAIL” if you don’t strictly abide by THE WORD of GOD. Because anything other than THE WORD of GOD is PURE EVIL and soon you’re going to “begin to question your love” for each other and then you’re going to CHEAT ON EACH OTHER and YOU WILL FAIL at your marriage and you will be DOOMED, YOU SINFUL HEATHENS. And so help me, WOMAN, you better BOW DOWN AND SERVE YOUR HUSBAND because THE BIBLE SAYS SO, you INFERIOR WENCH. I’m obviously paraphrasing here (except the parts in quotes and really, I’m not that far off what he actually said anyway), but any monkey can read between the lines.
It was just incredibly bizarre. I have never heard such a negative marriage sermon before. I’m all for preaching fidelity in marriage, but come on. There are better ways to go about it.
Or maybe I’m just a Godless Heathen whose marriage is DOOMED TO FAIL because I don’t bow my inferior ass down and service my husband in every way he demands.