And I can’t seem to bring myself to click purchase<\/i> on a single item.<\/p>\n
I am incredibly cheap when it comes to buying things for myself. (Unless we’re talking music from my absolute favorites.) I agonize over every last dime I spend. Never mind the fact that the money in my<\/i> bank account is essentially for me to spend as I please. I waffle and debate and more often than not walk away without buying anything.<\/p>\n
It stems from getting fired and having no choice but to spend my money on nothing but absolute essentials. And then having to make a decision between paying bills or paying for the medications that were more or less keeping me alive. <\/p>\n
Now buying anything frivolous for myself makes me twitch with guilt no matter how badly I want something—or how cheap it is. I even agonize over my music purchases, which can be incredibly painful.<\/p>\n
Bob and I are not hurting for money. We’re not exactly rolling in it<\/i> either. We’re comfortable. We can pay our bills without issue and still have money to put into savings and budget for the fun stuff.<\/p>\n
And yet, I balk at getting a haircut, buying clothes that fit, or splurging on goofy items I imagine would make excellent fidget tools<\/a><\/b> to soothe my bad-addled brain.<\/p>\n I suppose that makes me a responsible adult?<\/p>\n Or just crazy?<\/p>\n I have no idea.<\/p>\n —<\/p>\n It’s odd…when I was looking for things to get for Bob for his birthday, my only hang up was what to get him. Once I figured some things out, it wasn’t difficult to spend the money. Buying something for my husband, I barely thought twice. I have a folder currently sitting on my desktop titled “wishlist.” It has pictures and a text file of links to things I’ve been considering buying for myself for my…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":13910,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"fifu_image_url":"","fifu_image_alt":"","iawp_total_views":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[48,103,6],"tags":[225],"class_list":["post-2089","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-anniversaries-other-important-dates","category-because-i-am-a-fucking-adult","category-this-is-my-brain-and-welcome-to-it","tag-225","wpcat-48-id","wpcat-103-id","wpcat-6-id"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/www.getalifebooks.com\/media\/graphics\/featured-whatisit.png","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.getalifebooks.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2089","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.getalifebooks.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.getalifebooks.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.getalifebooks.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.getalifebooks.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2089"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"https:\/\/www.getalifebooks.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2089\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11303,"href":"https:\/\/www.getalifebooks.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2089\/revisions\/11303"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.getalifebooks.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/13910"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.getalifebooks.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2089"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.getalifebooks.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2089"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.getalifebooks.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2089"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}\n
\n ![](\"https:\/\/www.getalifebooks.com\/media\/graphics\/headphones50.png\" "\\"now")
<\/td>\nGotta Be Wrong Sometimes
\nOAR<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/table>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"