Nonsequitur Life

As it turns out Nurse Brain and Dr. Brain are not on the same page. It turned out to be a good thing, but I could have done without the added stress of misinformation in the first place.

When I first talked to Nurse Brain, she told me the EEG was clear and found nothing, but Dr. Brain wanted me to go for NEUROPSYCH TESTING.

‘Scuse me?

A doctor of said testing was supposed to contact me but hadn’t, so she had to investigate as to why. When she got back to me she told me that I hadn’t been contacted because I needed to establish care with a psychiatrist for my ADHD.

Again…’scuse me?

Nurse Brain told me she would call PNC mental health to line up an appointment with a psychiatrist for me so we could get this taken care of as soon as possible. She ran into the same problem I did the last time I tried to get [back] into Park Nicollet mental health—NO APPOINTMENTS. So she planned to call back on the following Monday morning during their four-hour window when appointments were available to schedule. That morning she called me to tell me they had appointments available but they needed ME to call because they had to ask me personal questions.

Fantastic.

Also bullshit.

When I called the only two questions the woman asked me were my name and date of birth.

Nurse Brain had told me that when I gave them my name, they would pull up my file and see the notes from Dr. Brain and they would line me up with the proper doctor.

Again…bullshit.

The scheduling woman picked the first available appointment—October 21st—and scheduled it for me with a random doctor. When I mentioned the neurologist notes about being treated for ADHD I got a very noncommittal and unconvincing, “Oh yeah, he can do that.” Sure he can legally prescribe narcotics for me, but does he actually KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ADHD? Not all psychiatrists are equally educated on these things.

But what do I know?

I took the appointment and waited for my follow up with Dr. Brain. I asked Bob to come with me so he could ask questions if my brain shut down on me like it always does when faced with stressful situations.

Bob and I spent the time leading up to my appointment questioning whether or not this was the right path to continue on. Neuropsych testing? What does that even entail? (A google search yielded plenty of results that really did not sound like the correct plan of action in this case.) How much is this going to cost us and since it would be with a doctor outside of PNC would the insurance even [pretend to] cover it?

We decided we’d see what Dr. Brain had to say about it and make a decision from there.

When we finally got to my appointment, she told us the EEG was completely clear. Even when I was experiencing the smoke smell for several hours there was not a single change indicating seizure activity or anything else. Even my bout with extreme dizziness and nausea while playing Minecraft indicated no abnormal activity. She told me that people who are predisposed to seizure activity have “electrical markers” in their brainwaves to indicate potential problems. I had none of that. My brain is clear.

This is great news—there is nothing seriously wrong with my brain.

It’s also incredibly frustrating because I still have no answers.

She did say I could try checking with an ENT to see if they find anything, but it’s highly likely they won’t.

She never mentioned neuropsych testing until I questioned about Nurse Brain’s information. (Nurse Brain was conveniently absent—a different nurse was on the clock.)

Apparently Dr. Brain doesn’t actually think I need the testing. It’s really expensive, it takes hours to complete, and it’s likely the conclusion they will come to is that I have ADHD—which I already know.

At my first appointment with Dr. Brain, I mentioned my problems with absolute horseshit memory. I said I didn’t know if it was just ADHD or if it was something else. She said it was more than likely the ADHD because I am way too young for dementia problems. She reiterated this fact at the follow up and said that getting treatment for ADHD would likely treat the memory problems. If I still had the issues to the same extent while being treated, then it might be worth pursuing neurospych testing, but as is it’s not worth it.

I’m glad we agree on that.

So unless I end up pursuing the testing, I’m done with Dr. Brain and the neurology department.

When I got home from my appointment, I logged in to my medical chart online and cancelled my psychiatrist appointment. I don’t believe (and Bob fully agrees) that a new psychiatrist is what I need right now. Yes the ADHD problems are an absolute bitch, but I don’t have a lot of faith that medication is the right path—at least not right now. There are other things I (or we) want to explore for now. Things that might not treat the problem directly, but will lead to other things that can.

I’m just gonna go smear peppermint oil around my nose to mask the gaddamn smoke smell.

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Heard the World O.A.R.