Grand Theft Horse…

Red Dead Redemption

aka

Grand Theft Auto: Wild, Wild West

Or as I like to call it:

Grand Theft Horse

Bob borrowed Tommy’s copy of Red Dead Redemption and has been playing it for the past week. I didn’t see all of it as I was distracted by other things, but I saw most of the story. I have learned many things watching Bob play this game.

A.) I could NEVER play it myself, simply because it requires entirely too much coordination—things like AIMING? Oh hell no.

B.) Hookers? Everywhere. And they will say ANYTHING to proposition you.

C.) The dialogue is awesome between characters. The snark. It is endless.

D.) Cows are dumb.

E.) If you’re going to shoot a bear, aim for the head. Otherwise, you will just piss it off.

The ending wasn’t at all what we expected, which was both cool and disappointing. Cool, because it was unexpected. Disappointing, because it was kind of…depressing…I guess. Though with a game like that, I suppose you can’t very well expect a fairytale ending. (I won’t launch into my tirade about the awful, depressing ending to Final Fantasy X and how I would have been so pissed off with the campy-steaming-pile that is X-2 if it weren’t for the beautiful Sooper-Seekrit Ending that they give you to make everything right in the world again. Because that’s a whole different franchise and has nothing to do with Grand Theft Horse.)

What?

Something to say?