it's a convoluted mess
Contrary to the inanity that I write here…I don’t suck at writing. That is not an easy thing for me to admit out loud. (Or in print on the internet, as the case may be.) I am the queen of self-deprecation, and depression and anxiety like to try to convince me I suck at merely existing most days. I have a difficult time saying I’m a good writer without feeling like a complete fraud. Every… Keep reading…But that one night…
I feel like I’m running out of time on an important deadline. I haven’t done any prep work. I am completely unprepared to even start, much less finish on time. It sounds like some sort of stress dream. Only it’s not a dream. It’s just one of the many obnoxious ways my brain manifests unexplained anxiety. I’m not actually running on any deadlines—that I know of. It’s entirely possible there’s something I need to do,… Keep reading…Never quite ready at all…
I’m genuinely curious how old people think I am when they see me. For the most part, I get the impression people think I’m much younger than I am. It could have a lot to do with my height (4′ 11.5″). I don’t even register on most “adult” height charts. They all start at five-feet. Every time I get measured at the doctor, the nurse always double and often triple checks because I can’t possibly… Keep reading…It’s hard to see it now…
It’s three in the morning. I have an appointment at 10AM. Sleep is for the weak, apparently. I’ve been trying to sort out the latest writing debacle happening in my head and I think I’ve only served to confuse myself further. I am good at things. It’s no secret that I repeat myself constantly when it comes to writing. (And everywhere else, but we’re not talking about that right now.) When a story loses steam… Keep reading…Holding down this spot…
Anxiety is a weird beast. Strange things spike it at even stranger times and I find myself jittery and nauseous with shooting pains, all over something completely innocuous. Fun times. And by fun, I mean EFF YOOO. Anyway. Things that are good… 1.) I fixate a little too much on word counts when it comes to writing, but watching the numbers climb makes me feel accomplished. Especially when the writing is slow going. Even when… Keep reading…Lost in a tricky maze…
Tradition is necessity. 2016 is the Year of the Monkey. 2011…The House… 2012…Denver Roadtrip… 2013…If it Ain’t One Thing… 2014…The Phantom Smoke Stench… 2015 was The Year of…I Don’t Even Know What Day it is Anymore… It’s been a weird year. That’s the best I can describe it. There was a lot of family drama caused by toxic people. There was a lot of money spent trying to find answers to chronic pain to no… Keep reading…A Year in Review…2015…